

Dear Diary,
I was going through the family album a few hours ago and I realized that there ain’t nothing like family. It’s a fact I just have to admit. Family supersedes everything; even friends. Let me put it this way, your family could be your friends but your friends could never be family. At least not strictly in the sense of the word. Through good times and bad, your fam’s behind you 100 percent, giving you moral support, telling you to remain strong no matter what. And even though the support they give to you isn’t always obvious, it’s there.
However, there are a few people in the fam who don’t care about the wellbeing about the other members of the family. Hey, we’re all human you know. Some of them don’t wanna do nothing for themselves. Let’s call them gold diggers. They got that rich uncle so they feel like they don’t have to move a muscle. These guys give family a bad name. Believe me it’s true; I’m talking from personal experience here. I don’t let that get to me though. I keep it real with those trying their best to ensure the family remains strong and healthy. There’s nothing like the reaction you get from a relative you haven’t seen in ages. “Look how big you are now! You were this small and such a little devil”. I’m telling you, most of the stuff they say about you makes you wonder about yourself. It’s like traveling back in time to a place long lost yet ever present.
In some instances though, I feel like I’m on another planet. All I think is “What in heaven’s name are they saying! I don’t remember ever doing that! Oh well, I guess I really wouldn’t mind anything they say about what I used to do back in the day. However, I really do not need to be reminded about peeing in bed. Now that, I cannot stand. Lol.
Observation: Family is great to have. I don’t know if I could ever survive without my fam coz they always got ma back 200 percent. Friends do their best but not like family. Its wise to keep a perfect balance between them though coz quite frankly, sometimes fam just doesn’t understand! But hey, they still great.
ain’t- isn’t
fam- family
wanna- want to
Lol- Laugh out LoudDear Diary,
Today started out bad, and went downhill from there. I literally woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Snoopy apparently decided sometime last night that my slippers were the best place to dump the remains of the hot dog I fed him. I trustingly slipped my feet into my cute Mickey Mouse twins… oh, eww! Utterly disgusting! I can hear the squish my feet made, right before the smell hit me.
As if my morning was not bad enough, Daddy decided to go and slip on Asante’s dumb old truck and twisted his ankle. Meaning, no tennis for Daddy this Saturday morning. Meaning, because Daddy has to stay at home, everyone else has too.
I would rather listen to a scratched Marylin Manson CD than stay home with a sick Daddy, any day! Not even the whole packet of ear plugs I practically stuffed into my ears could block out the constant moaning! Every one could tell he was exaggerating the pain a whole lot. His moaning set the usually good Tanika off... the last thing any one wants is a crying baby, who doesn’t want her Mr. Booboo. The racket made Mummy mad… I am so, so sure I could see steam escaping out of her ears!!!! She was really grouchy, having to look after a sick man, who deliberately did not want to get better. Asante sulked the whole time, complaining about not going to the park with his friends Fafa and Asamoah. Serves him right, I say… this was his entire fault, him and his dumb truck!
So here I am, bored senseless, whilst Mansa, Samira and Adjeley have a wonderful girls’ day out. Staring at my Usher Raymond poster is not even helping. He looks so free… great body! I’m sure he never had to stay home with a ‘sick’ dad.
ADVICE
Although we may not always want to, we should try to listen to our parents when they try to point something to us or otherwise. Sure, there’s the whole generation gap issue but instead of becoming rebellious and regarding everything our parents suggest or do as outmoded, it would be far more rewarding to remain open-minded. Sharing our thoughts with our parents would not only make us discover the similarities between the generations, but would also help develop a good relationship with our parents.Family & Friends (Bolade Writes...)
Dear Diary,
Friends. I’m sure just about everyone has friends but true friends are very rare. Yeah we all got the type of friends whom we can talk to about the latest songs, fashion and other related stuff. But how many of them show their face when you got a problem? How many of them bother to call you when you’re feeling too down? Well, that’s one class of friends.
The other set of friends are those who only come through when its time to chill. Ask them to help you with an errand or two and they busy themselves or ain’t feeling well. Invite them to a party and you can bet that they’ll show up with their latest designer clothes and ice. We all enjoy the company of the “boys boys” and “girls girls” but they are never really around when you need them. The closest they ever come to caring is by pretending. Like when they meet you someplace and go like, “charley I hear say u dey sick, abi u make better now?”. The best reply you can give em is “yeah, but with no thanks to you”.
True friends are always there when you need em and are ever willing to help you out, no strings attached. They’ll give you stuff you need without wanting anything in return. To them, your friendship is more than enough a reason for them to help you out.
Observation: True friends are like diamonds, they’re dear and rare. False friends on the other hand, are like stones, they’re scattered everywhere. A word to the wise……
*ice – jewelry
*boys boys, girls girls – friends you hang out with most of the time *
charley…….. – pidgin English phrase which really means “I heard you were sick, I hope you are better now”Family & Friends (Tungtaeya Writes...)
Dear Diary, I got you just today, and it must be a coincidence (or it’s just destiny) but I’ve got this issue that I just have to put down…umm, how should I say (write) this? Okay, you know my favorite friend Shola right? Well, she left Ghana and she didn’t even tell me! I thought we were best friends!! Yea, I know what you’re gonna say; the essential thing is that that statement is past tense right? Sure, we kinda drifted apart during the final months of school, but c’mon, she could have at least dropped a hint! And what’s worse is the fact that she asked Adjo to tell me…She knows I totally detest Adjo! It’s really unbelievable. I guess I didn’t know her as much as I thought I did. All the same, I can’t help feeling lonely (yea, me going all sentimental is weird, I know) and sad. We shared some of the greatest times together. Laughing Out Loud…like that time when we decided to experiment with our chop box food in school and ended up eating nkate boga with pepper sauce and kenkey…that was crazy! Hmm... I only wish that we did not keep quarrelling during the SSSCE period. And now. Now, she’s left for good and I’ll probably never see her again… Darn! I guess I now understand what Ms. Ankrah used to say about not knowing the value of somebody or something until you lose it…had to learn it the hard way. Oh my goodness… I was supposed to start dinner 30 mins ago! I have to scram. Adios. Observation: Many of us young people take a lot of things for granted…it may be our lives, friends, family, opportunities, and a whole lot more. We rarely consider how valuable they are to us or how they help make life much easier. Waiting till we lose the important people or things in our lives is learning how valuable they are…the hard way. *nkate boga-peanuts *kenkey- a Ghanaian food *Adios-Spanish for goodbye. *mins-minutes
Introducing: The '16' Journal Series
One For Tough Times
What is this I hear about being strong
‘You’re strong, you can handle it’ they say
And for a split second they have me believing the same
But in each agonizing moment that passes by, it all seems to be a cruel game
And with tear drops sashaying down cheeks once risen with smiles
You cannot help but wonder about the depth of all those lies
And each time the awareness of helplessness does throng
I ponder what they really mean by me being strong
Ironic it is that they should choose to use a title as such
In the moments when the exact opposite is what rules as sane and rings as true
With the passing of days of gloom and the culmination of nights a-blue
There’s naught left to do but relinquish all that is to the Power anew
And then…it is in that cry of distress, or that sigh of immense fatigue
Or those periods of life when the words ‘hopelessness’ and ‘failure’ seem to form a league
Then, I understand the semantics behind the words they spoke before
For being strong has less to do with gleaming muscles that remain sore
Than it has with the resolution to persevere and once again open another door
If true strength lies in weakness, then it’s logical to assume the following
That true wealth lies in poverty, for then you appreciate more than what is a-glowing
Or that the most worthwhile lessons lie in those moments unprepared
For then you accept things as true that you would never have dared
And in the midst of all those complexities
Its a fact that simplicity eventually overturns all your facilities
And especially that it’s in those moments of fear
That you can little else but hope with all you are, as you shed that final tear
Anti-Climax

Angela Wainaina(center) was an exceptional and beautiful person, both inside and out. To some she was a sister, a daughter and a friend. To others, she was that voice on the radio who represented their struggles and talked about the issues that others avoided. To many of the participants at the 2008 Young Women's Knowledge & Leadership Institute, she was all that and more; she was one of us. An activist. Angel was always ready to help out, or just hang out after a strenuous day of talking about human rights, economic issues, sexual reproductive health etc. She was someone who spoke freely about what she believed in, but who also respected others' opinions.
I have two vivid images of her in mind. One where she was in full Kenyan traditional garb, during our YOWLI conference, and the other when we were at a beach in Dakar. Beautiful and free-spirited. Its hard to imagine that someone as full of life as herself should be gone so quickly. Many YOWLIs connected with her on different levels. I connected with her because we're both journalists, and we both love writing. I found it admirable that she was willing to go on the radio every single day and talk about the poverty and suffering that people were undergoing in the impoverished neighborhoods of Kenya. Its one thing to put a pen to paper and talk about these issues, and its another thing altogether to put your own voice and name on air and condemn injustices. It makes you more vulnerable. Yet Angel was willing to do that, and she did. It helped that she was good at it, but her passion more than anything is what is evident.
I remember on the last day of the YOWLI Conference, when El-Hadji Diouf - a popular Senegalese football player - came to show his support for us, Angel and Kgomotso had the privilege of taking a picture with him, and I caught the moment. I teased Angel that I wasn't going to give her the picture, until she paid up, because this was celebrity status right here. Lol. Of course, I emailed her the picture the moment I uploaded it onto my computer....who could resist her charm? And at the beach when we were trying to negotiate to buy beaded jewelry. And before one of the Privatization workshops when we staged our very own photo shoot. So many memories in only a month of knowing one another.
The last time I spoke to Angel was about a week ago. We were catching up with one another, and she was telling me about her latest project in acting, and about how the radio job was going great and all. And she mentioned how she loved my blog and we should work on a project together...It's really hard to wrap my head around the fact that she is gone. I've never really had a problem dealing with death in the past, and I normally don't even shed a tear until a good couple of months later, but this. This is someone who was so full of life, and so committed to making the world a better place. And so young, with so much potential. She'd already achieved so much, but was still striving on. Yet she was so humble about it, you wouldn't even know the kind of force she was.
For such a person to be taken away as a result of someone's negligence! I came across a CNN article on the Nakumatt fire last week and read through it. But never would I have thought that she would be a victim of that fire. As always, everything is linked. Governments who are not willing to spend and invest in proper energy and electricity initiatives, and instead spend on themselves. Citizens who have to deal with continual power outages and have to opt for generators to keep business and life going. And for heavens sake, institutions that care not to invest in the security of their workers and clients. How on earth could those security guards close the doors to that supermarket when there was a fire going on? One of the first things you learn about fires, is to keep doorways and pathways open. And the reason for that dumb move was to prevent looting? When people's lives are at stake? Obviously we seriously need to re-prioritize a lot of things. Whats even more annoying is the response teams actions on the videos that some people took...they didn't seem like they were in any sort of hurry to do anything. We need to work on our immediate response initiatives otherwise we shall continue to lose great assets to our communities. Until our government leaders get off their high horses, and realize that nothing can or should be neglected in development, well, enough said. To the families and friends of the 23 victims of that fateful fire, take heart. To those who's family members are missing, keep the faith.
Angel, you were a blessing to me and I'm sure to all who got a chance to interact with you. Your work is very admirable, and you've probably done more than some of us ever attempt to do in our lifetimes. Your legacy will live on, as each YOWLI continues to do what we all pledged to do in July 2008. You have done your part and you have done it beyond all expectations. You can hand over the mantle now, and know that you will forever be in our memories. We never got to do that project together, but we are both a part of a bigger project : of human and women's rights activism. Stay beautiful and blessed, until we meet again. RIP.






